I’ve found my tribe and they are hookers

Bet you didn’t see that coming, did you?

Yes, I will explain myself.

In October, I decided to finally join the rest of the planet and learn about the series of tubes known as the interwebs. So, I set myself a task to master all things online. Yes, well, I will let you know when I get there.

So far, I have gotten a massive education in social media, online marketing, copy & content writing, blogger, wordpress, location independent businesses, HTML, CSS, and PCP. Wait, no, not PCP. PHP.

Also, photoshop, pic monkey, survey monkey, and mailchimp. Seriously, what’s with all the monkeys? And 99.99999% of that was free. Which is staggering, really.

I have also run across a literal metric ton of fem-preneurs.

Is that a thing, fem-preneurs? I think I just made it up.

Do you hate it?

You’re right, I hate it.

Alrighty, then, not fem-preneurs, but strong, independent women who have created their own businesses and are all living and working in amazing and inspiring ways, women like:

The more I read about these women’s experiences of striking out on their own and creating their own lives and businesses, the more I feel like I have found my people. We don’t all have the same exact goals and dreams or definitions of success or happiness. We don’t have identical skills or backgrounds.

But we do all have in common the belief that we are the ones to make ourselves happy.

And that we are absolutely capable of doing so. We’re not going to wait for the perfect job, the perfect company, or the perfect man astride a milky white steed to give us our happy ending. We can seize our destiny in our hot little hands and give ourselves that happy ending. Yes, well.

Discovering them and following their exploits has allowed me to not only believe that what I want to do is possible, but has given me new and exciting ideas for how to do it. How marvelous to know what works, what doesn’t, and what still remains to be done.

Because, as much as being a trailblazer is magnificent, that whole going where there is no path and leaving a trail can also leave you with prickers in your flesh, spiders in your hair, and cat scratches from where the damn branches whiplashed your face. It helps to have someone who can say: look out! Right there is where I fell into a bog. Now, you don’t have to.

Wait. Hold UP. These are the hookers?

Um. Well…they are women who sell their services for money.

But, frankly, we ALL do that. It’s called a job. And DON’T tell me you haven’t felt the same way at some point.

But calling these successful female entrepreneurs hookers? That would be terrible, awful, even. Almost as bad as calling them fem-preneurs.

I thought you said you were going to talk about the hookers!

Yes, I am getting there.

In all my internet ramblings, the person who has taught me the most, the one who I quote like she is the Bible (that doesn’t sound stalkerish, does it?) is Ash Ambirge of the Middle Finger Project.

Ash is talented, generous, hysterical, and, yes, foul mouthed. But, you know, in a loving, supportive way. I have imbibed an obscene amount of brilliant advice (brilliant amount of obscene advice?) on writing, marketing, business, and the business of living from her site.

She runs her biz and life quite differently from the way good girls are raised to do. She has spurned business as usual. Kicked it right out of bed and spread the word about what a lousy lay it is.

And this week, we are playing hooky from life as usual. Life Hooky, in fact.

What is life hooky?

Ash and Jess (her equally brilliant and foul mouthed girl wonder side kick) are creating “international cross-cultural travel escapades for small business owners who want to play hooky from their routine and do something worth remembering.”

The very first retreat, the maiden voyage as it were, is to Costa Rica this week. And I’m going!

They have crafted this adventure for people who wouldn’t necessarily just pick up and go by themselves. And, even though I am the kind of person who not only HAS repeatedly just picked up and gone, but actually moved there, dug in, stamped my foot, and refused to come back, I am over the moon about the trip.

I am so excited I already want to go back.

How did this happen? By design.

Ash and Jess have set out to create a very different experience. And already, it’s in every detail.

They created a private Facebook group six weeks ago and have lovingly nurtured it like it was a tiny sprig of mint in the snow, and they were sure AS HELL drinking mojitos come spring.

They kicked it off with a personal handwritten note (actual mail!) telling us how thrilled they were to have us, and made us feel that it was important to them, to the trip that WE were going.

Also, they sent mustaches. You know, to take that all important first impression introduction photo for the group. Let’s just say: it set a tone.

They gifted us books from Amazon scientifically demonstrating that it’s not just fun to take a break from your work and have an adventure, it’s actually essential for your focus and creative mind. So, you know, you should really think of this as a business skills course. With sloths for extra credit.

They have continued to post enticing tidbits online that have worked us all into a state of frenzy: stunning views of the Pacific from our hotel terrace, the infinity pools where we will cocktail at the happiest of hours, gorgeous tile work, delectables to try, and scenes of life going on there right now. And everyone going has dived in and spent six weeks laughing, sharing stories, talking smack.

We are already all in love and bonded. We have our gang names, group jokes, and a secret handshake is in the works. We’ve commiserated about the trauma of squeezing into swim wear after this winter and decided that everything will look better with just A LITTLE MORE ALCOHOL. Frankly, I feel like I’m going to Costa Rica with a bunch of great girlfriends.

The kind of girlfriends who get into a truly self righteous huff when they discover that you can’t get a cocktail at Newark Airport before noon on a Sunday. Savages! (the blue law abiding bar owners, not my girlfriends, you understand).

And we’ve never even met.

And, inevitably, someone, someone who shall not be named, has christened us the Hookers. The Life Hookers. Classy, right?

Now I do realize I am giving you this review of Life Hooky before the actual trip, but it is already one of the more fun gallivants I have ever been on. And I have gallivanted A LOT, including an all you can drink wine cruise around the Mediterranean where we drank the boat dry by Sicily. Not even kidding. They had to go to a local vineyard and restock.

Also, if we all get arrested or press ganged on a ship to Tahiti, consider this my final farewell.

So that’s what I am up to this week. And what about you, couldn’t YOU use a little adventure in your life?

<pSo, what are your inspirations?  You can have mine while I am away.  BUT I’m going to want them back.  And, where do you want to gallivant?  Do share!


  1. Patti Pokorchak (@SmallBizSalesCo)

    I want to go too!! Anything legal for money has always been my battle cry – does that still make me a hooker? What a great tribe to be part of.

    I’ve signed up for their newsletter. I’m sure you’ll let us know how it is. Costa Rica is on my bucket list.

    • wendy

      Patti, by all means, you too can be a hooker! Costa Rica is crazy gorgeous-I can definitely see you here!

  2. Brooke

    GAH I wanted to go SO BAD but already had a trip booked when I found out. I’m jealous!

    I’m happy to have found your blog, Happy hump day!

    • wendy

      Brooke! I am sad you aren’t here (in Costa Rica), but happy you are here (on my blog!) next trip I am sure!

  3. Michele

    I like the tone you use to convie insight. You are a great cheerleader of the human spirit.

    • wendy

      Michele, thanks so much! Enjoying the weather?

  4. Razwana

    So honoured to be part of the hooker tribe, Wendh. And thank all the forces that Ash and Jess exist!

    • wendy

      I agree!!!! Yay!

  5. allthingsmorgan

    Outstanding, like a HOLY COW, and very inspiring, as in stumbling into a magnificent ancient altar! Great read Wendy ….. looking forward to more from this whole group.

    • wendy

      Dori! Thank you so much! I am grinning like a crazy person. I have never been so happy to be called a cow! Not that I have been called a cow before. To my face. In English.
      So sorry for my delay in reply-our internet access in Costa Rica was, um, spotty. I have checked with the other hookers, and most have blogs, so we will try to get some hot hooky action out for all to see. Sincere thanks again!!!!!!!!!


    Wendy, this made me cry! I didn’t get to read the whole post before the trip, but reading it now gives me goosebumps. You and Jamie were so inspiring and I feel so lucky to have met you. The way you both love life and each other just makes me so happy! I hope we can all keep in touch, this isn’t the end of Life Hooky and the Hookers! Hope all is well and I was glad to hear you two made it home safe to your doggies. Much love and besos. PURA VIDA!

    • wendy

      Melissa! I could not be happier that this made you feel this way. Though I am sad I made you cry. It was truly wonderful meeting you as well, and I look forward to getting to know more about your plans to conquer the world when we get the reunion tour happening. Of course it’s not the end, the Hookers are just getting going. We are in high plotting mode! Next step: we need a jet. Any ideas? Besos to Sin City.

  7. Saya Hillman (@sayahillman)

    Isn’t it the best experience to find your tribe?!? I love reading a book, listening to a speaker, perusing a website and that feeling I get when I end up nodding to every thought, highlighting every word, feeling like the person is IN MY HEAD.

    Can be so hard to find a tribe, community, genuine connections as an adult.

    I got fired 9 years ago and have been blissfully self-employed, living my passion and helping others live theirs, creating community for myself and for others, since — getting let go was the best thing that ever happened to me! Though of course in the moment, you just think, “Oh shit, now what’ll I do for health insurance?”

    “WE are the ones to make ourselves happy” — YES. Ever since I started believing this, my world has been filled with goodness. Hope more people realize this!

    Great post!

    • wendy

      Saya! I am so happy to hear you say that. I totally agree-it’s one of the hardest things to do, to make those connections, once you are past college. I have struggled with this FOREVER, since I have never spent more than five years in any one place. I have lost and had to try to rebuild a community over and over. So hard, but it is something I crave so much! I am thrilled this post resonated with you and I appreciate you letting me know! Inspires me to write more! On that note (being inspired), I checked out what you do and I absolutely LOVE it. You are the coolest!


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