You should just give up already

Have you ever worked at something that seemed unreasonably difficult?

That took four times the amount of time you expected and was way harder than it should be?

But, dedicated trouper that you are, you just kept your head down, nose to the grindstone, trying and trying to get it done.

My next words may surprise you: stop trying.

I have spent the last four days trying to write a short document according to a very specific model that had been recommended to me. FOUR painful, awful days.

The more I worked at it, the more it retreated.

But I kept slogging away. Unsuccessfully. Unproductively. Unhappily.

Until a friend said: maybe you should stop trying to cram yourself into that model…

It’s not right for you.

And the clouds parted, the angels sang, and the perfect words began to flow out of my pen keyboard with ease.

It feels like it’s what it needs to be. It feels like me. It feels RIGHT.

All because I gave up.

I’m NOT saying you should give up on anything you don’t master on the first try.

Getting out of your comfort zone is inherently uncomfortable.

And most everything worthwhile takes real, sustained effort over time.

But I am saying that, sometimes, the reason something is so hard is because it is the wrong thing..

TRAVELER’S TIP: Whatever you are banging away at and finding so very frustrating, ask yourself: is this hard because it is new to me? Or is it because it’s actually the wrong thing to do? Now, tell me, what are you struggling with? Should you stay or should you let it go?


  1. Karen J

    Gold stars scattered all over this post, Wendy! 🙂
    One of the reasons I just “got out of Dodge” …

    • wendy tells all

      What a lovely thing to say! 🙂 So glad it worked for you and that you are on to greener pastures!


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Wendy White - Messaging strategist for coaches & consultants

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